“You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” ~Brene Brown
Perfection is as elusive as silence. It’s difficult to even describe true perfection. How can you put into words something that’s impossible even to imagine? Instead, many people waste their time focusing on what it isn’t. You can never quite reach perfection; and just when you think you’ve achieved it, something shifts, and it’s lost. We waste so much time trying to be:
The perfect parent
The perfect worker
The perfect wife
The perfect Daughter/son
STOP trying to be perfect and focus on being GOOD ENOUGH because Good Enough is good enough.
Here are some tips for you:
Respect and love yourself. Accept you are an individual with your own rights and integrity versus subjecting yourself to all the self-abuse and self-depreciation. Treat yourself with the respect you deserve. Are you beating yourself over something that you could have done differently? Let go of all these negative thoughts in your mind. You did what you could with what you had at the time
Get started. Even if you’re not sure yet what you’re doing, give it a try. You may be better at it than you think, or your task may be easier than you imagined it. Even if your first attempt doesn’t get you anywhere, perhaps you’ll know what or who to ask to get going. Or, you may just discover what not to do. Most of the time, you’ll find that you imagined the barriers as larger than they really are
Reflect on your opportunities. Failure is relative. Perhaps you thought your cookies were a bit overdone, but everybody else ate them up. As the doer, you probably know more about what went in than anybody. Whoever benefited from your work cares more about the result and may never even notice the process. In addition, consider what you learned from your opportunities, and how that will help you improve. Without mistakes you will never learn.
Reflect on your successes. Think back to something you have done or made that was successful. Probably you experienced some uncertainty along the way to creating that success. It may not have been perfect, but you still achieved your goal. Your reservations and concerns will make you feel “safe”, but don’t let them keep you stuck. Rather than do a few things perfectly, accomplish many things successfully.
Know your inherent worthiness. Try repeating affirmations that remind you that your value lies within. “I am more than enough.” If we look outside ourselves for validation that we are enough, we will always be tempted to over -deliver.
DON’T compare yourself to yourself.
Comparing yourself to others can easily lead to feeling inferior. There will always be a lot of people ahead of you in any area of life.
- So compare yourself to yourself…
- Look at what you have overcome.
- See your improvement; see how far you have come.
- Appreciate yourself and focus what you have done and are doing rather than what everyone else is doing.
“We aren’t meant to be perfect. We are meant to be whole. If you allow yourself, you can become stronger in the very places that you’ve been broken,” said Jane Fonda.